As the year comes to an end, I thought I’d post one last message in 2015. Twice a week I have a morning call with a group of people. We’ve spoken by phone on Sunday and Wed/Thursday since 2011. Each call last an hour or two depending on what’s going on in our lives and what we’ve been doing to solve life’s most interesting offerings.
Approximately, 457 times that’s close to 37,440 minutes. That’s a long time and yet it doesn’t seem that way to us.
I’m telling you about the call not to say we’re so dedicated (although we are) but to share one moment in our discussion. Annually we ponder “what a difference a year makes?”
Now you take a moment and ask the same question. What would you say? For us we’ve watched kids growing up. Loved ones passing on (not always in death). How our spiritual practices have evolved. Work… getting a job… losing a job… not working for someone else or learning how to work for someone else. Our calls cover a number of issues but there’s two things that hold it together.
No matter what’s happening right now – good or bad – it all changes. Relationships matter. Sometimes people come into your life for a few weeks and some for years. They become an invaluable support system if you let them. Ultimately with the right support system and if you do the work, then everything can and does change for the better.
Here’s a list of some of the gems we’ve learned together.
- There are no bad relationships. Just encounters designed to teach you about yourself. When you aren’t clear -intentional – about who you are and how valuable you really are there’s always someone there to help you figure all out. Be clear and firm on what it means to you to be respected, to give and receive love, compassion and sacrifice. Otherwise the lesson can be painful and long.
- Everyone is a leader. No questions asked. Being a leader doesn’t always mean you get the title. Being a leader means being authentic and true to yourself and your craft. It’s about speaking with authority and knowledge. It’s means you are accountable for your actions and the results you get. It means knowing when to speak up and when to shut up and let the words for you.
- Are you playing to win or playing not to lose? If you can’t stand the thought of getting 200 no’s then you’re not committed to the goal. It only takes one yes to be a success. But sometimes you’ve got to hear a lot of no’s before you get that yes. Be in it to win it.
- You only grow when you’re ready to do so. No one can do it for you. No one can make you ready. Only you can do that. When you’re ready the teacher, opportunity will appear. Grab it.
- Look inside for the answers. Mentors, advisors, parents, friends all others tell you what they would do but only you decide what will be done.
- Let the past be in the past. Life is way too short for regrets and regrets build up to add more weight to the journey. Travel light.
- Take time to think regularly. One thing that can get away from you is the time to just sit and think. Some call it meditating. Others call it praying. Doesn’t really matter what you call it. Just do it. The process of stopping, constructing a question and then searching for an answer is invaluable. But the world says just do it… you’ll know it when you see it… go with your gut. Well you gut is right when you’ve done the work of thinking through and developing a roadmap.
- Write out your goals. I know you hear that all the time. But until you actually write them out in full … describing them in detail and when… they are just wishes. Challenge yourself for 2016 and actually take the time (20 minutes) to write out your goals. Read them every morning or night for one month and then watch what happens. Most people don’t achieve their goals because they weren’t taught how to write and pursue them. If you need a guide let me know and I’ll send you a one pager. I promise if you try it you’ll see a BIG difference in your productivity.
Well it’s time to let go of 2015 and start 2016. Have a safe and joyous toast to the past 365 days. Then look forward to the next.